Don’t Get Married Because…

Despite the steady decline of people who no longer believe in marriage, there are still more who have faith in it. There are still more people who wanted to get married, who are excited to be married, and who love the idea of getting married.

To these people, here’s for you.

We commit to marriage for lots of reasons. If it is LOVE, that’s wonderful! However, for some, it is not always because of love. In the olden times, they were married because of cultural or family tradition like arranged-marriage, while some are married to pay debts. I’m not sure if it still does exist nowadays.

Marriage is a big commitment. If you are free to make your own decision about this matter, I hope you take time to think about it and ask yourself why.

Regardless of your reasons, don”t get married because of the following.

* Don’t get married because you feel alone and lonely.

First, there’s a big difference between being alone and being lonely. You can be alone but not lonely because you are contented and happy with your life without a romantic relationship. On the other hand, you can be with someone but feel lonely and unhappy. Don’t think that having someone will guarantee you happiness. Don’t settle just because you feel lonely or you are afraid to be alone. Marriage is not the answer to your loneliness. You should be happy being alone with yourself first before you decide to marry someone. Don’t put your happiness in someone else’s hand, especially not your partner’s. Be happy with yourself first.

* Don’t get married because you felt pressured.

Isn’t it annoying when people around you keep asking when are you going to get married? But no, don’t compel yourself to marry because your mom wants you to, or because all of your friends have already married. After all, they are not the ones committing that ’til-death-do-us-part’ vow.

Don’t get married because you felt pressured of your age and the length of your relationship. Never marry when you are not ready.

* Don’t get married because your Ex is moving on with someone new.

The emotional mayhem brought by your ex’s engagement with someone new is not enough reason for you to rush into marriage. Don’t get married to prove to your ex that you are the one who got away. Common, you know better than that! If you are stirred up upon hearing the news that he is getting married, let it go. Yes, it is irrational when you’re confident that you have moved on, but that is normal. After all, you had once imagined walking down the aisle with this person. That sting of emotion that is bothering you is okay, but don’t let it push you into marrying your partner now because you want to get even.

 

Marriage is not a race. It is neither the measurement of happiness nor success. Before you say I do, ask yourself if you really do. Get married because you want to and you feel that is right for you.